Jasper and Emmett take to the water in...
Seamen extraordinaire
A tale of tight canals, sand-filled crevices, and vampires with little to do but each other.
A tale of tight canals, sand-filled crevices, and vampires with little to do but each other.
A/N: This bit of fun was written for Twilighted's Friday Free For All. It is crackfic slash (Jasper/Emmett) and full of NC-17 vampire fun.
Many thanks to ArcadianMaggie and Theladyingrey42 for prereading and TwilightMundi for betaing.
Disclaimer: All Twilight characters belong to Stephenie Meyer, Little, Brown, et. al. No profit was made and no copyright infringement is intended.
Jasper broke through the surface of the water and shook his head to free it from various bits of seaweed that had collected in his messy hair. Once he was free of ocean flora, he set about removing some of the sand that had collected in his swimming shorts. When that was accomplished, he finally looked around and took stock of the remaining members of his coven.
He spotted Rosalie and Alice quickly. They weren't far away, and were splashing a good deal as they finished emulating the swimming patterns of a nearby dolphin population before moving on to reenacting scenes from The Little Mermaid. He could tell there was some sort of competition going on having to do with the exact angle and height with which they burst out of the water to land on a large rock whilst tossing their hair back and poking their breasts out, breasts which they'd covered (barely) with brightly colored shells.
He hated to break it to them, but he saw no point in their Ariel-emulation. After all, Eric was the only one worth watching in that movie, wasn't he? Such a stud. And he was always blowing the flute. That was just Symbolism 101.
Jasper took a moment to recall how the seagull had rubbed Eric's foot all over its face.
He adjusted his shorts again as he bounced along in the waves. That shit was hot.
Jasper had no desire to get closer to the beach, where Esme was sunbathing with Carlisle beside her, reading back issues of his favorite medical journal. But his desire to stay out at sea was mostly due to Edward, who was driving Jasper crazy.
